Bookmark 21: Growing Up

July 28, 2009 at 2:06 pm (Uncategorized)
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I had a lot of errands that I needed to run yesterday; all of them of vital importance if I wanted to be able to go to Osaka, Japan on September.  For one thing, as embarrassing as it may seem, I needed a passport – and only then could I even hope to be able to get my Visa.  There’s just so much to do, and in the past the work I need to put into this would have dissuaded me, but there have been some changes with regards to who I am.  As a friend had repeatedly said to himself (according to his blog) “If you don’t do it now, you will never do it.” And that much is true: if I don’t take this chance to visit Osaka (and Kyoto \o/) now, I will never do it.  This is why I’m working hard to get my passport and my Visa as soon as possible so that I can go to Japan with Karen, Aissa, and Tonet.  Yosh!!! We’ll get there!

My mother had always wanted me to travel – of course, she wished that of all her children (there are three of us, two women and a man now), but she seemed to wish that most for me.  For example, she wanted to take me to Hong Kong for my eighteenth birthday, but since I was very well aware that we were having some financial trouble around that time, I insisted on having a quieter birthday celebration instead – Starbucks was fairly new at the time, and I decided that having coffee with my friends and my awesome sister is as good a sign of me being an adult as a coming out party (we call them debut here in the Philippines; it’s apparently traditional) or a trip to another country.  In many ways, I thought of that as a nice symbolic transition from being a young girl to being a young lady.  Of course, that didn’t mean that I had to really leave childhood behind.  A part of me will always be child-like, and I like it that way.  I have no intention of ever changing that.

But I do move forward.  I find myself doing everything I can to make sure that this vacation pushes through; and I think my mother is right (as she often is, though I would never admit this) in thinking that travel will help me become a better person.  As we speak I feel the weight of some degree of responsibility slowly piling onto my shoulders.  This trip to Japan is yet another marker in my life, another sign that I’m growing up.  It a sign that I am a little braver, that I am a little more willing to venture out on my own, that I am more likely to take the steps that I feel I need to get to where I want to go.  I’m off, relatively on my own, to experience something far different from what I’ve experienced before.  I take some time to run the errands that I need to run for myself, errands that I need to run on my own.  This, I imagine, is what it must REALLY feel like to grow up quickly.  This, I believe, is my taste of overwhelming independence.  Scary as hell, but what part of a new chapter isn’t?

When I come back, I will be vastly changed.  And I can’t help but feel that the change is beginning now.  I may not have gone off when I was eighteen, but twenty-five is just as good an age to see the rest of the world as any age.  I’m pretty excited.

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Bookmark 20: On the Subject of Dating

July 28, 2009 at 11:32 am (Uncategorized)
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Last week, I posted a rather self-indulgent entry on a date I had with my boyfriend Jie, which in turn prompted one of my friends Sese to write her own post regarding the subject of her perfect date concept. That got me and Sese wondering if more girls should post on their blogs (or other social networks) what it is that they expect from men when they go out on a date with them.  It got ME personally thinking about whether or not guys should do the same thing.  Apart from “getting it out there”, every person’s concept of a good date just may very well be what we all need in order to approach the concept of dating these days.  Clearly there have been changes since the time when “dinner and a movie” would suffice.  Of course, this will probably not bring about a perfect dating world by any means, but one can’t help but think that maybe this will open a much bigger discussion on the subject of the modern date.

To this end (and despite the fact that I’m not a very famous blogger anyway), I would like to invite any person who reads this entry to post about their ideal date or their favorite date so far on their blogs and link back to this particular bookmark of mine so that I will be able to read whatever it is that you have to say about the subject of dating.  This will not only give me interesting stuff to read, but this will allow us to have an insight with regards to inter-personal expectations in a date.  Of course, it may be different between men and women if not different people, but it will probably provide us with clues that may help us navigate through the strange jungle that is contemporary dating.  This is of course rooted in the suspicion that it’s not just a matter of finding the right person when it comes to love: it also has something to do with being able to enjoy dating, and thus creating a comfortable confidence that will allow people to be exactly who they are while shining at the same time.

While you may interpret otherwise based on yet another post I wrote on this blog, this is not meant for the purpose of creating new rules for dating.  As I have mentioned before, these are merely meant to serve as guidelines or jump-off points from which we could figure out how to find and connect with that person with whom we’d want to spend the majority of our time.  If everybody would take the time to express exactly what it is that they want – no pretensions and no lying in the hopes of getting an ideal match – then maybe we could either find like-minded people, or acceptable compromises.  I’m not saying anything definitive, but I can’t help but feel that none of us take the time to talk about expectations that may unfortunately result in conflict.  By getting these out there, then maybe we’d do better.

Just maybe, you know?

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Bookmark 19: The Songs Of Wicked

July 25, 2009 at 2:53 pm (Uncategorized)
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I have loved musicals for a long time now, ever since that one day when I was five years old and my mother made me listen to a casette tape of The Phantom of the Opera, one of Andrew Lloyd Webber’s famous stage musicals.  Evidently, this got me hopelessly hooked on songs interspersed with narratives – don’t get me started on Disney movies, especially the Alan Menken and Howard Ashman combo, because it’s likely that I’ll never shut up.  I joined the choir a little bit later and took voice lessons because I liked singing in general, and songs like this in particular.  It probably didn’t help that around that time, Lea Salonga was the pride of the Philippines and actually got to voice a Disney princess (killer combo, as far as I’m concerned).  It shouldn’t be surprising then, that I became a fan of theater at the age of five.  I believe I mentioned my appreciation of theater in a previous post.

That being said, I believe that no musical has affected me the way that the musical Wicked.  Around that point, I hadn’t read the novel by Gregory Maguire, but immediately and hopelessly fell in love with Elpheba when I caught the Tony Awards on television a few years ago and watched Idina Menzel sing passionately about defying gravity.  Up until today, I sing that song as a sort of mood booster – if people tell me that I shouldn’t even try (including myself), I remember that song and dammit, I’ll DO it.  Because “’til I try I’ll never know”.

Of course, it’s “Defying Gravity” that introduced me to the musical, but I fell in love with some of the other songs as well – the most notable being “What Is This Feeling?”, “Popular”, “One Short Day” and “For Good”.  The first two I loved evidently for their entertainment value, and the last for the poignant bittersweet emotion that it always evoked.  I’m almost regretful that I wasn’t younger because I’ll be damned if “For Good” isn’t a perfect high school graduation song.  I still feel like singing that to all the friends I’ve ever had whenever I feel like we won’t be seeing each other for a good while.  “One Short Day” plays in my head whenever I have adventures in the city.

I sing “Popular” when I’m in a funny mood, and I listen to “What Is This Feeling?” when I need a laugh.  There’s something about Galinda/Glinda’s brand of self-importance that was so endearing.  It was fascinating.  That, in turn, I think, made me a huge Kristin Chenoweth fan (I apologize for all the commas).  Not only did she inhabit the Galinda/Glinda character well, she also has a whole lot of talent encased in a four-foot-eleven frame.  This impresses me mainly because I’m four-foot-nine and makes me think that if I’m so inclined, I could actually find success onstage (but of course I won’t because I’m quite happy where I am right now, thank you very much; I can sing wherever I want, whether or not people want me to).

There are hardly any words that could describe my love for these songs.  If you haven’t heard them already, you can always check them out here.

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Bookmark 18: Cooking, With Feeling

July 24, 2009 at 1:28 pm (Uncategorized)
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I wrote in a previous blog post that have discovered the joys of cooking – and for the most part, that is pretty much what cooking is all about for me.  However, it has been changing for the last couple of weeks, and before I knew it, I was starting to cook whenever I had a bad day, whenever I feel really sad and want to feel good about myself.  I suppose that this technically falls under the category of “fun”, but I think it’s something deeper.  That being said, the fact that I’m cooking when I’m going through certain emotional states reminds me of this book that I had read back in college.  The title of the book is “Serving Crazy With Curry”, and it was written by Amulya Malladi.  Serving Crazy is apparently not Malladi’s best book – in fact, many people seem to agree that it is definitely not up to par with her debut novel “A Breath of Fresh Air”.  Not having read any of her other books to this day (not for the lack of trying to find them in local book stores, mind you), I wouldn’t have the authority to comment.  What I CAN say, however, is that I completely fell in love with the plot of the book, and the stories of the characters themselves.  I do admit that the characters themselves are a little flat, but they all had stories, and I simply loved the complexity that their own stories lent them – even if their voices were not that clear.

But of course, I ended up babbling again.  What I was trying to say is that these days, I find myself reconnecting with the character Devi the way I had connected with her the first time I read the book.  While I did not try to kill myself the way she had, I understood her motivations perfectly.  Nothing in her life had gone right, and she was tired of the mild disappointment with which many people – including some of her family – regarded her.  While there are many things that have gone right in my own life, I also understand that there are also things that I have done wrong.  These things did not necessarily disappoint my own family, but they were puzzled by it, and the fact that they have difficulty understanding is as difficult for me as it had been for Devi.  There is also the subject of Devi’s silence.  After her suicide attempt failed (care of her nosy mother), she chose to withdraw from the world by refusing to speak and instead expressing herself through her cooking.  I don’t think I could ever stay quiet as long as she did, but I’d be willing to try.  Devi’s silence and sudden love for cooking unconventional food (which drove her mother crazy at first but eventually won over the whole family because the dishes are delicious) brought her entire family together, eventually prompting them to address their individual and relationship issues.  Eventually, Devi came to terms with her own problems and began to heal.  I can’t help but feel that by cooking things that people enjoy – though I don’t think I’ll be as innately talented at cooking as Devi – I am able to also come to terms with myself.  There is something magical about a meal that you share with other people; perhaps it is because this is a kind of togetherness that is enjoyed.  The more enjoyable the togetherness is, the easier it is to connect with each other.

To me, cooking is my way of reaching out to my family without words, and reaching out to myself.  I think the reason why I love it so is because the lack of words is what makes it all the more profound.  Cooking for the family is a reminder that no matter what I do, and where I go, I have a family who loves me as much as I love them.

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Bookmark 17: Poetry From Two Margins

July 23, 2009 at 12:12 pm (Uncategorized)
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As of late, I have been feel the very mild melancholy that often creeps up on a person during the rainy season – and indeed, it is very rainy this season.  Perhaps the melancholy is far more persistent these days because the weather has acquired a rather distressing habit of alternating between sunny and rainy within a span of approximately twelve daylight hours.  Being rather sensitive to all sorts of things (even though I could be insensitive when it comes to a whole lot of other things too), I often find myself needing to find ways to make the melancholy go away.  Usually the most effective tactic for me is reading one particular poem by Maya Angelou.

I had known of Maya Angelou since I was in High School, but the poem that often makes my days brighter in the gloom was not brought to my attention until I was in college, when it was became an assigned reading.  Evidently, the poem made me fall in love with Angelou’s work: her themes were rooted from being part of not one, but TWO marginalized identities (as a woman, and as an African-American).  Her words held so much strength and hope that one couldn’t help but be inspired.  Despite having an easier life than Dr. Angelou, I felt a kinship with her because she had tapped into all the feelings of hopelessness and spun it into something powerful.  She had turned it into an open defiance of the status quo.

In moments of gloom, I need only remember that there is no such thing as no hope, not unless I believe that there isn’t.  I may be down for now, but still I rise.

You may write me down in history
With your bitter, twisted lies,
You may trod me in the very dirt
But still, like dust, I’ll rise.

Does my sassiness upset you?
Why are you beset with gloom?
‘Cause I walk like I’ve got oil wells
Pumping in my living room.

Just like moons and like suns,
With the certainty of tides,
Just like hopes springing high,
Still I’ll rise.

Did you want to see me broken?
Bowed head and lowered eyes?
Shoulders falling down like teardrops.
Weakened by my soulful cries.

Does my haughtiness offend you?
Don’t you take it awful hard
‘Cause I laugh like I’ve got gold mines
Diggin’ in my own back yard.

You may shoot me with your words,
You may cut me with your eyes,
You may kill me with your hatefulness,
But still, like air, I’ll rise.

Does my sexiness upset you?
Does it come as a surprise
That I dance like I’ve got diamonds
At the meeting of my thighs?

Out of the huts of history’s shame
I rise
Up from a past that’s rooted in pain
I rise
I’m a black ocean, leaping and wide,
Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.
Leaving behind nights of terror and fear
I rise
Into a daybreak that’s wondrously clear
I rise
Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,
I am the dream and the hope of the slave.
I rise
I rise
I rise.

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Bookmark 16: On A Wonderful Date

July 22, 2009 at 10:13 am (Uncategorized)
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In a previous post I had discussed how guys get the attention of their geek girl.  While this isn’t exactly an extension of that post, this is nevertheless related in the sense that this is my reflection on what it is that a geek girl considers to be a wonderful date.  Or, I may simply want to squee over the nice date that my boyfriend and I had last Saturday.  That may actually be the more truthful reason for me to post this right over here.  Still, I figured that by sharing with you guys what made the date good for me, you will be able to glimpse how different (weird/warped/whatever you call it, I consider it a compliment as long as it means non-standard) a date with a geek girl can be when compared with a normal girl.

Before anything else, however, I would like to put in a disclaimer that there is nothing wrong with a normal girl either.  They’re perfectly ok, in my book.  Unless they’re cruel just for the sake of being mean or having fun, in which case, I’d rather that guys stay away from them.  I don’t like the idea of guys suffering in such horrible ways just because of a woman.  I mean, it’s true that I take pride in having a kind of power over some guys simply by being female, but I’d rather not abuse it that way, if you know what I mean?

Anyway, that being said, I should get to the rest of the point of this post: I had a wonderful date at Trinoma with Jie last Saturday, starting with a semi-late lunch on his part and a post-lunch treat on my part (I came from my dad’s place and treated the family to a Greenwich pizza and some pasta, because it was grocery day, we were lazy, and we had absolutely nothing to cook in the refrigerator).  The original plan was that we were going to watch a movie, but since there was nothing on but Transformers (which we’d already watched) and Harry Potter (which everyone wanted to watch, thus diminishing the chances of us getting seats), we decided to just make our own fun.

Anyway, the date began with Oysters Rockefeller (they weren’t called that, though, because it was a Spanish place) at the Rastra Cafe (I hope I remembered this right, because the oysters were delicious; if I didn’t I’ll correct it later).  Jie had his with rice, and I filched off of his plate.  I was also nursing an order of tequila sunrise, mainly because I thought I love fruity alcoholic drinks and being able to order them in the daytime is nice.  Our conversations throughout the meal swung from serious to funny, and focused mainly on our jobs and families – which made it really, really interesting for me.  By the time dessert came – it was vanilla ice cream topped with chocolate and strawberry syrup (with a cherry! I love cherries!) – I was pretty happy with how the date wa going.  And before you ask: no, it wasn’t because I was drunk.  The Tequila had me buzzing for a bit, I guess, but it was gone by the end of the meal care of the oysters.

In any case, from the Cafe (which was more of a restaurant, really), we went to the bookstores of our choice (that is to say, Jie wanted to go to Fully Booked, and I wanted to check out PowerBooks – it caused a bit of confusion at first because I mixed those two up account of I lump all sellers of books into a category close to heaven).  First up was PowerBooks (because it was closer, really) where we didn’t find anything of interest in particular.  But Fully Booked, as usual, is a completely different story.  I made a beeline for the Manga Section while Jie checked out the art books and some of the comics (he found a deluxe hardcover edition of Neil Gaiman’s “Whatever Happened to the Caped Crusader?”, which I ended up not getting because I wasn’t sure if my Dad already had it – incidentally, he didn’t T.T).  Eventually, we split up and wandered into different parts of that fairly small book store.  Just to be a little more adventurous, I decided to get out of my comfort zone and check out books on business and finance (I tend to stick to fiction).    It was there that I found Rich Dad, Poor Dad and Cashflow Quadrant.  Both books have been highly recommended to some of my friends, and I decided to take the initiative – I bought both those books and a thick notebook with a nice cover, which I’m currently using to motivate myself to keep a handwritten journal.  Around that point, Jie had shown up again – apparently, he had found me a copy of Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, and he decided to BUY IT FOR ME.  Can you feel my glee?

Let me take this moment to drive home the point that I had already mentioned in the Getting That Geek Girl post: in order to successfully charm a geek girl, you must really have a sense of what she likes.  In my particular case, taking me to a book store as part of a date is an awesome move (of course, it helps that my boyfriend is a reader himself), and it’s even more awesome that he got me a really interesting book – a book that my dad didn’t already have on his shelf and would likely never buy.  Flowers wouldn’t have impressed me.  Chocolates, I admit, would have been better.  But Pride and Prejudice and Zombies made me feel really important to him. :)   Jie didn’t seem to find a book that he likes, though.  Next time, I’ll be the one buying him stuff :>

The book store trips weren’t what made the date really special, though.  After we wandered a bit, checking out some clothes in stores (clothes shopping is interesting), looking at phones, and commenting on furniture, we found a public bench in one of the smaller hallways of the mall, and we sat down there, curled up, and read the First Lesson of “Rich Dad, Poor Dad”.  You may not think that’s much, but I personally think that THAT made it my favorite date with him so far.  Just sitting and reading a book.  Jie thought I was weird when I told him that, but that’s okay.  I AM weird, and I was being honest.  And he didn’t mind that this kind of thing makes me happy, which makes him even more awesome in my book.

He walked me to the cabs and while we were waiting in line, he started to tease me again – he likes teasing me, and I like being teased (not that I don’t tease him either).  Eventually, I got a cab, and he handed me my books with the understanding that we will text each other as soon as we’re both safely home.

I was grinning the entire way back.

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Bookmark 15: Cooking Is Fun

July 21, 2009 at 10:06 am (Uncategorized)
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Those who have known me for a while now know that I used to think that I’m a bit of a flop in the kitchen – that is to say, I conceptually know what it is that I need to do in order to get the recipe done, and I do it.  Sometimes, it turns out ok (and by ok, I mean that I didn’t almost burn it and the kitchen down, or that I didn’t make something that does not quite sit well in the stomach) and sometimes it doesn’t.  For the longest time, the latter was more true for me than the former, and that was why at some point in the past, I decided that I’ll never ever cook well, so I simply gave up.  I honestly didn’t plan to cook again.  Not in a million years.

And then something happened.  Something I call THE BET.  I’d rather not get into the details of what this bet is about.  All I can say is that if I lose, I have to cook for people.  And hopefully not kill them.  Of course, this scared the shit out of me and I decided that even if I AM determined to win, there’s still a chance that I’ll lose.  Given this, I thought that I should start learning to cook, if I wanted my friends to survive whatever it is that I’ll probably end up serving.

At first, I had the inevitable problems.  The main problem, of course was that I was trying too hard, and I was pressuring myself to go through the motions of cooking – which really makes things worse.  What I had forgotten is that whenever I try too hard (and there is such a thing), I overthink things and tend to overlook some of the things I needed to do when I’m cooking.  In other words, because I worried too much, I became absent-minded.

Then one day, on a day off I took because work was getting to be too much for me and I seriously needed a break, I decided to make The LoliDudes RabuRabu Tuna Pilaf for lunch – because I wanted something quick and easy, and something that I had good memories of (I got a taste of the pilaf that was originally cooked in the video, and it was DELICIOUS).  And because I had good feelings associated with the recipe, I ended up not worrying too much about it.  Lo and behold!  That tuna pilaf ended up being one of the best that I have ever cooked for myself.

The sense of accomplishment that brought me eventually gave me the courage to try and cook for other people.  One morning, I cooked the tuna pilaf for my father and my sister, along with a surprisingly tasty scrambled egg recipe that involved mustard, butter, white cheese and crunchy garlic bits.  They went pretty well together, and because it was such a hit with my dad, I thought that I should cook for my family more often.  Cooking is infinitely better when you’re cooking for people that you love.

What this eventually led to was a series of cooking experiments every week or so that seemed to get better the less worried and more confident I became about the result.  At this point, I’ve stopped thinking of cooking as a means of payment for the debt; I was honestly enjoying it as an activity.  Reading up on recipes and figuring out how I could modify them in such a way that I will be able to execute them easily (some ingredients aren’t readily available here) and in such a way that everyone in the table will be able to appreciate it has become a challenge that I welcome every so often.  Thinking up new twists on old favorites has also become a game for me.  Cooking has become so much more than a necessity; it’s become a sort of passion for me.

Of course, this is not a passion that I will turn into a profession – I love cooking, but only for the people that I care about the most.  I am by no means a chef when it comes to the result of what I had whipped up in the kitchen, but what I lack in skill, I more than make up for in sheer joy at what I’m doing.

Cooking is fun, and I’m not afraid.  I think that’s the best part.

(And in case you’re wondering, no, I haven’t lost THE BET, and I don’t plan to go out of my way and lose. :P )

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Bookmark 14: Getting That Geek Girl

July 16, 2009 at 6:06 pm (Uncategorized)
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[This was supposed to have been a contribution to another site, but it has been pointed out that it may be more suited to this blog. I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed doing readings in order to write this. Edited appropriately for this blog.]

Being a geek girl, I found myself fascinated by the idea of love and geekery – in particular, the part where guys apparently have trouble getting the geek girl. I’m quite sure that there are a lot of guys out there who can’t help but fall in love with their resident geek girls. Who wouldn’t? We’re smart, we’re sassy, and we tend to be adorably so absorbed with the object of their geekery that we don’t particularly care how silly we look (so what if I sound narcissistic?). Chances are, we’re also the girls who would drag everyone we know to the opening weekend of the latest sci-fi/robot/superhero movie, on the grounds that it’s probably going to be the coolest thing ever (or, conversely, we want to see exactly how writers and the directors screwed it up). The best part is, we will probably understand anyone’s fascination with video games, comic books, web design, breakthrough music technology and other so-called juvenile preoccupations. Most of our dates will likely be spent indoors, watching stuff like Battlestar Galactica. Or Torchwood.

Still, geek girls are still GIRLS, and it would take some doing before a guy can get us interested in pursuing any form of potential romance with him. Of course, what this means is that you have to find a way to appeal to both the geek and the girl in us – it may seem tricky, but rest assured: it’s quite far from impossible. With the help of my wonderful friends from Plurk (their account names are listed at the end of this article), we have managed to figure out some of the ways to get the geek girl of your dreams.

Don’t Be Scared. Confidence is key. You can use this to get the attention of any girl, of course, but a geek girl is doubly impressed by a guy who isn’t self conscious (or who, at the very least, does not let something like uncertainty get in the way of what he wants to do). Being nervous in any way may cause you to try too hard at being impressive, and that will just put women off. Trust us, when you don’t let the fear control you and if you keep things simple, she will appreciate it.

(Protip: The best pick-up line is “Hi!”. Trying to be too clever will get you turned down, mainly because they make you sound desperate. Save the witty Star Wars references for a little later.)

Take An Interest In What She Likes. This also works for “normal girls”, but you can expect geek girls to appreciate the gesture better. You don’t have to actually like what we like (don’t force yourself to like slash or yaoi), but you should at least try to appreciate and learn more about our geeky interests. For us geek girls, our passion for our fandoms and interests is an essential part of who we are. Taking a genuine interest in what geek girls like is practically synonymous to taking a genuine interest in us as people.

(Protip: Under no circumstances should you criticize a geek girl’s love for her particular geek pursuits, nor should you fake your interest. Geek girls can tell if you’re faking, and their wrath is both creative and painful.)

Have An Actual Conversation With Her. Again, geek girls are very smart. They appreciate good conversation. If you don’t make any contributions to the conversation, then we will quickly grow bored with you. We may like talking about our interests, but unless you step up and share your own interests with her we will probably just write you off. So don’t be afraid to speak up and share a part of yourself with us. More often than not, this will make us feel like you value us enough to let us get to know you.

(Protip: You get extra points if you manage to get her to laugh with you, not at you – unless you’re poking fun at yourself, in which case letting her laugh at you is okay.)

Pay Compliments, And Be Sincere. This bit is pretty tricky. The thing about geek girls is that there are compliments that we aren’t likely to accept, and we’re smart enough to know if you’re lying ESPECIALLY when the compliment involves their external appearance (though if it were me, I’d accept it as a matter of fact and encourage you to TRY HARDER). Take the time to observe us before paying the compliment, so that you’d know which compliments are the ones we’d take seriously. Do not take this lightly. Again, this is because geek girls can pretty much tell if you’re lying. And we can destroy you.

(Protip: For the most part, geek girls appreciate being told that they are interesting, intelligent and unique. In some cases, “frightening” is also considered a compliment.)

Be Extra Thoughtful With Gifts. This is, of course, the major difference between geek girls and “normal” girls. Often used in conjunction with “taking an interest in what they like”, gifts for geek girls are best appreciated if they coincide well with favored hobbies. Flowers are nice, and chocolates are delicious, but it would look like you had not put much thought in getting the gift. Buying us a cute pirate hat or the complete run of the No One Lives Forever series, however, just may be the most romantic thing ever for us. Putting on a dress for lulz might help too :3

(Protip: Do your research, and listen attentively when she talks about stuff that she likes, but doesn’t have yet. Get your gift ideas from there. The gifts will get love, and so will you for knowing exactly what to get her. If you’re clever, you may not have to spend too much either.)

Of course, these are not rules they are merely…guidelines. Nevertheless, these approaches seem to be the most effective in the context of getting a geek girl. It certainly wouldn’t hurt to try them.  If you have any more ideas on how to charm geek girls (or stories on how you got your geek girl), feel free to share them via your replies. :)

Many thanks to ushuaia, shizen, anti_literati, awesome_gia, Scriviner, raccoondog, sakuranbo, lainewell, multipleegos, casualsavant, managrmr, ksolaris, idle_eidolon, slender_dragon and izzy_isa, who participated in the discussion and put their two cents in.

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Bookmark 13: Hooks and Thread

July 10, 2009 at 9:45 am (Uncategorized)
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We sat waiting for the doctor – my sister, my stepfather, and myself. I took the day off because my headcold symptoms have not gone away despite the rest and the medication that I have been taking. I wanted to make an appointment with another doctor, but apparently my stepfather only ever trusts his cardiologist. And my stepfather had a check-up anyway so I went with them. The experience was…interesting and fun, especially since the doctor figured out that I have a very serious case of sinusitis. Didn’t know heart doctors could do that. It’s almost amusing how a heart doctor has ended up helping me breathe better this week.

But before the appointment and before the diagnosis, I was sitting in the waiting room with my stepfather and my sister. There were two other patients ahead of us, and they were taking their sweet time. It was fine. I brought some crochet thread and my small crochet hook with me; perhaps I can try to finish that table runner/decor that I promised to make for my mother’s living room. So I picked up the work and began to work on its pieces again.

The piece is supposed to be made out of several snowflake/flower motifs that are joined together by even MORE crochet – it’s not as complicated as it seems, actually, and the repetitive activity of making several of those motifs proves to be very very relaxing. The fact that it will result in an actual product is just icing on a cake.

As I concentrated on working on yet another motif (insert through loop, hook thread and pull through loop, wrap thread around hook and put hook through space below, hook thread and pull through…), I contemplated on the beauty of the activity. You primarily start with thread, then with a hook, you would weave something fragile and beautiful, almost like lace. In my case, it felt like I was, via a series of loops and knots, encouraging a flower to bloom.

It was at that point that I succumbed to my usual romantic fancy and imagined that the thread just may be like people, and the hook may be the world. It pulls us through loops, puts us in knots, makes us touch some parts of the past. The hook is, frightening in its own way – after all, it IS a hook, but inevitably, it is what turns us into something beautiful. It is, in many ways, what shapes us. Of course, the thread isn’t necessarily passive throughout the whole thing – they do have colors and qualities that are unique to them, making the knots rest a certain way and the product look a certain way. I have had my share of stubborn thread, but they usually make the most interesting products. They don’t turn out the way the pattern wants them to turn out, but that makes them unique, and that’s what makes them individuals.

This thought process then led me to think that perhaps – JUST perhaps – life is a conversation between a person and the events that they lived through. There is what makes a person fundamentally who he or she is, and there are the outside forces. We may or may not let them affect us, but in the end, the combination creates a wholly unique work of art.

And with that as a last thought, the doctor’s nurse/secretary called out my stepfather’s name.

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Bookmark 12: Rainy Days and Mondays

July 7, 2009 at 3:25 pm (Uncategorized)
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In my previous post, I mentioned that my Monday this week was very shitty. Perhaps it’s because it was, in fact, a Monday. Or perhaps it was because it was worse than a regular Monday – it was a rainy Monday that didn’t look like it was going to be rainy when I left for work in the morning.

As it happens, I would on occasion go down to the nearest Starbucks (and isn’t there ALWAYS a nearest Starbucks?) and get a cup or a mug of mint tea when I want to feel better. Yesterday was one of those occasions. By that point (around 12:45), the day had involved me skipping breakfast because I wanted more sleep, finding out that we had new and more stressful protocols because the clients of the clients were being pricks – read: we now have to write 3600 words a day with research, as opposed to the previous 2600 (believe me when I say this is significant) – my head felt like it was stuffed with unprocessed cotton, my sinuses hurt, and the makeshift meal I ate in place of a lunch so I could finish writing by 3 pm was definitely not sitting well in my stomach. I NEEDED that tea. So off I went to get it.

I didn’t count on the clouds being unable to hold it in. So there I ended up: sick, stressed, and stranded in Starbucks. It’s not as if I didn’t bring an umbrella, but I knew just by looking that it would not be able to withstand that kind of rain. Chalking it up to Murphy’s Law, I decided that I should at least be thankful that I brought a book with me and that there was a small unoccupied table and chair that I could use while waiting for the rain to ease up. Munching on a oatmeal cookie with raisins (I believe in my heart of hearts that it is the cookie that was made just for me) and sipping my mint tea, I found myself ignoring the book I brought along in favor of the crowd of college students who were quite obviously working on a school report during their break time. I wasn’t surprised. There was a school practically across the street. There were three MacBooks in a row, open and being used. Those didn’t surprise me either. It was a rich kid school, after all.

And it was that thought that made me pause. Granted, the school WAS a school for rich kids. But the presence of MacBooks really shouldn’t have made me think “typical”, with a slight mental snort. Just because I couldn’t afford a Mac doesn’t mean that Macs are reserved for rich people. And I really shouldn’t resent them for having Macs when I don’t because I don’t really want a Mac for myself. Macs scare the shit out of me; they look like they’re intelligent enough to rise up against mortal men.

And don’t you people tell me that they can’t. They have the mark of the fruit on them. While there is no way of telling if the fruit from the Tree of Knowledge did in fact look like apples, the iconography communicates well enough. The Macs have gotten a hold of the fruits of the Tree of Knowledge. They are aware. They THINK independently, and they probably know a lot of embarrassing truths about both their owners and themselves. And judging by the sound they make when we turn them on…they’re not very friendly.

Having gone through that whole train of thought, I opted to brave the rain and get back to my work. I had so much more to write, after all. It didn’t matter that I was wearing a long shift with wedges – completely inappropriate for the weather, but then again I didn’t expect the rain to fall so hard – because the rain had let up enough so I could use my umbrella to keep my head and torso dry. My feet and legs were already beyond salvation.

I ended up conceding that it could only get worse. And thankfully, I was wrong.

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